Recently, I was talking with my college freshmen about definitional arguments. As an example, we were discussing the question of whether flirting qualifies as a form of cheating. As they struggled to define the characteristics that all forms of infidelity share, some cleverly proposed that the matter of whether flirting is cheating depends on the level of commitment in your current romantic relationship.
At this point, I held up my hand with my wedding ring: “So flirting is out of bounds for me?” Most laughed and said yes, but a few weren’t ready to concede this—they suggested that perhaps my wife and I might be engaged in what the leftists are fond of calling “consensual non-monogamy” (or “swinging” in the parlance of the Beforetimes). I assured them that my wife and I are traditionalists, and so she is my one and only. At this, one student said, “I want to say something, but I think it might be mean.” After some reassurance that I wouldn’t be offended, the student continued: “You’re vanilla.”
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